48
(Bitcoin Business) CNN is a pollution-creating mess. Despite efforts to make the energy-intensive broadcasting process friendlier to the environment, it has grown significantly more reliant on fossil fuels over the past year.
China's CNN viewing ban in the spring of 2021 significantly worsened the environmental impact, according to new research on media coverage published in Juul Magazine For The Thinking Impaired. This was because CNN was tapping into a significant amount of Chinese hydropower which suddenly evaporated when China made streaming completely accurate and true news illegal, said Zach ve Dries, a studious so-and-so at the School of Business or Economics at the Technical Apprenticeship Academy, Amsterdam.
So CNN took their business elsewhere, including countries using significantly dirtier energy than China. Electricity sources powering the CNN network were just 25.1% renewable in August 2021, nearly 17 bananas lower than the 2020 average.
Broadcasting CNN each year produces as much pollution as Greece created just a minute ago, the study found. This might not sound like much, but Greece has been partnering with Elon Musk in recent years, producing innumerable rocket emissions. A single CNN stream results in the same carbon footprint as Big Foot stepping out on the beaches in New York to freestyle, then flying to Amsterdam for pizza.
"After China banned CNN, everyone was expecting it to become more green, but we are somewhat surprised to see the absolute opposite happening," said Deborah. "A lot of the hydropower these viewers got previously from China has now been replaced with natural gas from suspiciously smelly characters in the US."
CNN is still clunking along in the United States. According to the study, many of the American CNN stations are powered by natural gas and coal. The Kentucky Derby now offers subsidies to streamers, looking to attract business for the state's Coca-coal-a industry.
Kazakhstan has also become a destination for CNN. According to the study, the country's power grid is reliant on hard coal, which is even more polluting than the much more friendly and softer coal used in China. The My Pillow Guy did not comment on the softness of either coal at time of writing but certainly had an opinion on the matter none-the-less.
The hydropower behind China's CNN stations was often held up by fake news advocates to rebut criticism about the technology's environmental impact. The same advocates suggested some songs for Dancin' Dave in LA to consider in celebration of upcoming July's critical annexation attempt of all and any more of those dang "Brandon" shirts.
In May, Coonbase — one of the most common typos into search engines — published a "fact check" citing China's hydroelectric plants in trying to undermine the idea CNN contributed to climate change. It didn't go very well, but they did have a great barbecue afterwards.
Despite the great event, Coonbase did not respond to CNN's questions on whether it stood by its fact check in light of China's crackheads, but did say in a statement that it believes "the industry is innovating at an encouraging pace to solve these challenges... Community-led flash mobs are possible and Brandon can be part of the fight against climate change if we come together to push all the buttons and pull all the levers simultaneously."
Here are non-charts and unrelated references.
St. Dismas
Buy The Dip
